and you rip out all I have just to say that you've won;

[hetero]

[ It's Valentine's Day and Dean is on Cas' doorstep, taking a moment to compose himself into the cool kid everyone knows and loves. He pops his dad's leather jacket's collar up; it's too big for him, but it's obvious he's trying hard to fill it.

There's no reason to be nervous. They're friends and they've always been friends. So he finally knocks on the door. ]

Comments

[hetero]

... No, but... I mean, how long? If you woulda said something, I'd have stopped telling you about my dates... [ He looks guilty, because he didn't know. He just chalked everything up to Cas being weird. ]

[deism]

I enjoyed hearing about your dates.

[ amendment: ] If they were happy ones.

[hetero]

[ He chuckles. ] You're so weird. If you had dates while I... you know, [ had feelings ] I would'a been jealous.

[deism]

To have jealousy means to have hope for an occurrence.

[ he speaks quieter now, a little resigned. ]

[hetero]

[ He pauses before wrapping an arm around Cas, pulling him even closer. ]

Obviously you should've had hope, 'cause look where we are. There was nothin' saying... I couldn't like you. [ Except his flaunting of heterosexuality geez Cas that's all. ]

[deism]

[ he looks up without moving his head, giving a sadder look than he wanted at that statement ]

There was everything.

[hetero]

[ He can't say anything that would deny that. It's not like he made himself particularly available to Cas, or that he would ever show any interest in men. So he just leans over to kiss him very lightly, because he can at least do something to help now. ]

[deism]

[ he lets him, reaching over to stroke his gristly cheek a little to show he wasn't... well. jealous? angry? sad? just a stroke of comfort. ]

It's all right.

[hetero]

[ And he does feel better at that, pulling back and looking to the lake. It was getting darker, and though he liked the lake at any time of day, he figured maybe--just maybe--he should consider how Cas feels. ]

Do you wanna go home?

[deism]

It's colder now. [ he says it in a detached way, like he thinks dean is cold, and he isn't. ]

I'm sorry I forgot it was Valentine's Day.

[hetero]

[ He laughs a little louder than he was expecting, wrapping his arms around Cas further because he missed the tone and assumed Cas was cold. ]

It's not anything special. We coulda done this any other day.

[deism]

Yes.

But it was remiss of me. I should have gotten you a present. [ placidly allowing the arm thingy to occur, and leaning into him slightly ]

[hetero]

I didn't get you a present, did I? We're both jerks. [ But he freezes slightly as he thinks. Cas seemed pretty into the presents, and he did get him some chocolate before. ]

... Do you want something?

[deism]

[ i g n o r i n g him in favor of frowning a little petulantly ]

I would have gotten you something nice.

[hetero]

[ He takes that ignoring as a sign he should have gotten Cas something....... ]

Yeah? Like what? I bet I'd get you something better.

[deism]

No.

[ tossing his head back a little to stare at him directly ] That would be impossible.

[hetero]

[ He raises an eyebrow and takes that staring challenge. ]

You probably don't even know what kinda gifts are appropriate.

[deism]

As long as you like it, I don't care if it's appropriate. [ a little snooty at that. "appropriateness" was for chumps. ]

[hetero]

So, what, you'd get me porn mags?

[deism]

You still require them?

[hetero]

Well, you haven't put out yet. A guy's gotta keep himself entertained. [ No he's joking he's joking. ]

[deism]

[ why would you ]

Two options, then.

[hetero]

... What are they?

[deism]

I "put out."

Or I "watch" you pleasure "yourself" on busticious beautiful Asians.

[hetero]

[ He coughs a few times. ]

Why would you wanna watch?